Art: Natalia Tajera
She’s accessing a joyous inner conversation.
She’s speaking to herself differently now. She thought she was a victim to an external oppressor, but it’s been more dangerous than that.
She’s realising she had internalized all her oppressors from childhood. They’re still busy controlling & disciplining her as her inner voice. These voices create self-reproach when she’s just resting on the couch, reading a book, sitting in the garden, taking a nap ~ saying to her ‘don’t waste your time’. She’s been so programmed into being useful & productive that’ free’ time, indulgence, self-care becomes a ‘guilty pleasure’. That she should rest is intolerant to this inner oppressor disguised as ‘her’ voice.
This voice is there to steal her power. It tells her she’s lesser when she’s with a group, it tells her she’s selfish when she wants to pursue her dream, and it tells her she wont make it anyways ~ cause she’s always wrong. It’s there to create shame. She’s been sleeping with the enemy.
Not any more. Finally, she’s taking care of the little girl within. She’s dis-identifying with this voice. She’s breaking the oppressive chains & giving herself free rein. Everything she does, feel, thinks is ok. She’s un-hooking from the programme that tells her anything other than that she’s beautiful, awesome, gorgeous and perfect the way she is. She’s accessing her inner mother who has this soft golden voice of a most loving, indulgent, proud mom ~ and she says to her again and again how beautiful, gorgeous, wise, funny, courageous, talented and perfect she is.
Her inner father is so proud, his voice always assuring her she’s safe and protected, and she can go forth fearlessly into her dreams and goals. He believes in her and is always available. He wants to show her off in the world.
She and her inner child is finally having fun. She’s speaking to herself in a loving, indulgent and supportive way. She’s treating herself as precious. It is making her so relaxed and peaceful. The chattering in her head ends, and even if it tries to come back, she’s not paying heed.
Becoming her own dream parent is probably one of the most significant spiritual lessons she was meant to learn.